Sure Signs of a Good Weekend...

▪You’ve danced with a male stripper… on a mirrored table… convinced him that he loves women, even if it is only for the night… then break his heart by coming up short on the off fee.
▪You’ve eaten food so spicy that Thai people start to believe you when you say “Ben con Thai.”
▪You’ve watched at least one football match, and we’re not talking pigskins, folks.
▪A new friend offers you the keys to his motorbike for a water run. Later that same day, another friend hands over his brand new pickup complete with DVD player in the dashboard.

▪You’ve sung “Zombie” at the top of your lungs.
▪ You bought something shiny.
▪You bought three more shiny things because, hey, you can afford it.
▪ You’ve eaten at least one thing you weren’t able to identify, and found it to be delicious.

▪ A car full of people drives by and at least one of them shouts, "I love you!"
▪Your friends steal door prizes straight from the presenter's box when you tell them what strikes your fancy.
▪You order directly off the menu… written in Thai, of course.
▪You’ve seen the cute motocy-taxi driver three times in 25 minutes.

▪You’ve played volleyball on at least two different court surfaces.

▪You’ve been blessed by a monk.

▪The only reason you survived the bus ride was because you were blessed by a monk.
▪Your first bonding experience with a new group of friends includes a bottomless bucket of whiskey-water.

▪You have pictures like these...

A Cinderella Story

Upon purchasing our tickets for the bus ride from KL to Singapore (the country AND the city), we were told the six hour trip would only take us four. In the words of our bus attendant, a guy named Guy, “We drive fast- very fast.” Katie told us that this was probably because we had chosen a bus company her guidebook cautioned travelers to avoid. We looked at each other and shrugged. We told Say we would arrive at 4:00 pm at the Lavender Street Station.
First, we were shuttled from inside the bus terminal to a busy intersection outside (twice) before the man we were dutifully following hailed us a bus. We wouldn’t have followed just anyone around for twenty minutes like that, but he was sporting the standard uniform for the transportation industry in Southeast Asia- street clothes, walkie-talkie, fanny pack, book of “tickets”- so we obliged. Trusting that the person you are giving your money to is going to put you on the bus heading to where you want to go is half the fun!
Our pumpkin carriage lost its air-con after a couple of hours, so we were transferred to another for the Joho Bahr—Singapore leg. Customs here were a bit more stringent at the border crossing and this time they actually looked at our passports. Even after “recording” our desired stop, the driver emptied the bus at Beach Street, leaving us to wonder, “Where is Say?” Four hours later, we were truly stumped and decided to take action:
“Alright Keeks, call his cell.”
“Riiiight. Should’ve brought his number…”
“Okay, Plan B.” There is always a Plan B, even when there is no Plan A. “Facebook him and see if he has his number posted on there.”
In this case, Plan B necessitated finding an internet café in the dark, on a rainy night in a foreign country. Piece of cake. Say located us shortly thereafter on Beach Street- just like we’d told him, but we let it slide.
Shopping, eating and beach volleyball consumed the days leading up to New Years Eve. Since we bring the sunshine with us wherever we go, Singapore was no exception and they enjoyed a break in the weeks of rain preceding our visit. The day after we left, it rained cats and dogs.
So, drum roll please… the Republic of Singapore Navy proudly presents “Operation Black Enigma”, the Wardroom’s themed New Years Eve Ball. We don’t necessarily get the lingo yet, but we had a blast accompanying two naval officers for an evening of VIP treatment and member’s privileges. The entire trip we had been treated like princesses and now we were able to dress the part. To be fair, our Prince Charmings cleaned up nicely too.
We rang in the New Year with glasses of bubbly grape juice (unbeknownst to us at the time but, in hindsight, probably for the better) after an evening with magic tricks, martial arts and a six-course meal. We mingled with plenty of important people from the community, including Singapore’s Minister of Defense and his wife, who have been attending the function since 1977. They said this year’s ball was the best one yet. Well, duh.
A special thanks to our escorts, Say and Yongchye, for a fairy tale ending to our holiday.

Happy New Year—Sawasdee Bee Mai

Something Different

We flew out of Bangkok on Christmas day, after making it to the airport merely 40 minutes before our scheduled departure, only to find that our flight had been delayed by a half hour. What we thought at the time was, “Thank Buddha.” In retrospect, this was only the beginning of what proved to be an unpredictable holiday adventure.
We arrived in Kuala Lumpur without much more fuss, and waited patiently at the baggage claim until we were the only two people left in the terminal. Mac’s backpack apparently had other plans for the holiday because it had yet to show up. Summoning a truly Thai response of jai yen (“cool heart”), Mac approached the AirAsia counter and said, “So, I don’t have my bag.” The man, while slightly taken aback by our calm demeanor and the lack of obscenities spewing forth, eagerly located the missing luggage- still in Bangkok. Oh, right. Easily the smallest checked luggage on the flight, and you had to leave it behind? Sure, we’ll wait here until the next flight from Bangkok. 11:30pm, you say? No problem, where can we exchange some money? We found the currency exchange counter, and joked to ourselves about the large sign posted in it's window, reading "Will not accept USD $100 bills." We are living on the baht now, so our transactions went smoothly. We had stepped aside to check our exchanges when a heavily-accented man approached the counter, waving a hundred dollar bill. The man behind the glass politely told him they could not exchange it, to which the customer replied, "But this dollar!!" Apparently he, like many others, was unaware of the currently plummeting American economic situation. His response was the equivilant of going to Canada and proclaiming, "But this Thai baht!" or "But these shells so pretty!" or "But I skin this yak myself!" You get our drift...

Upon re-entry to claim Mac's backpack, we were subjected to the vigorous security checkpoint at the customs office. While walking into an area clearly designated as “No Entry,” we were stopped by a man in uniform asking, “Do you have passport?” We responded in the affirmative but before we could produce evidence to support this claim, he said “Okay” and waved us through. Brutal.
The Red Palm Hostel deserves mention here, as the staff is wonderful and hospitable enough to check us in at nearly 2:00 am. That morning, after quietly climbing into the bunk beds of the six person dorm-style accommodations for some sleep, we met a friend named Katie and decided to hit the town. Katie is an English teacher also, recently graduated from Oregon State University, and works in Japan. We had a lot of stories to share about the variety of teaching experiences in different countries and we knew that we liked Katie right away. For those of you who know us well, this says a lot. We had decided to tackle KL in the simplest way we could- a giant circle. We saw a lot of traffic, people and buildings that had no real cultural or social significance, so we stopped for lunch. It was at the Thai Cowboy Café where we met Malek and Abe, a pair of travelers from Lebanon and Sudan respectively. Malek often visited Malaysia for business and pleasure, as we came to find out, and Abe was hoping to study English in the city sometime soon. They asked if we had ever been to the pyramid just outside the city, and offered to act as our guides on this once in a lifetime expedition. A real pyramid? In Kuala Lumpur? Why haven’t we seen anything about this in any guidebooks, or heard about it from someone at the hostel? The entire time we were thinking, “Eighth Wonder of the World” until Malek told us we were almost there and we found ourselves still in the traffic-ridden city limits. We began to have our doubts. The “pyramid” houses a five-story shopping complex, complete with an ice rink at ground level and the three of us couldn’t believe we had just traveled nearly an hour to see a mall. “Is beautiful, no?” Malek and Abe beamed with pride, as though they had built the very foundation on which we were standing. “Oh yes!” we feigned our amazement for their benefit, and quickly began devising a plan of escape. After losing our tour guides and returning to the city center, we found ourselves right back where we started- only now the area had been transformed for the nightlife, with food vendors and sidewalk hookah cafes. What better way to experience the diversity that Malaysia has to offer than an apple/grape hookah and the Foul Medamas. The latter was a specialty dish, enthusiastically recommended by the restaurant’s proprietor who kept screaming the dish’s name until we ordered it.
Our second day in KL began with a more defined game plan as we tackled the Batu Caves, a Hindu temple situated cliff-side of tremendous limestone caves just outside the city limits. An honest cab driver gave us some background on the temple and relevant structures, including the 276 steps we would have to climb to reach the top. Nobody said anything about the monkeys. Sure, they seem harmless on The Discovery Channel, but let us assure you that they are heartless, thieving creatures. Case in point: one of the hairy mongrels stole an offering of jasmine flowers straight from a Hindu tourist’s hands, perched himself not two feet away, and proceeded to devour said donation. When not robbing the devout of their gifts to the Hindu gods, the monkeys spend their time chasing tourists and over-turning trash bins—you know, normal monkey stuff. I’m sure our racing hearts were due less to the climb and more to the numerous near-death experiences with rabid primates.
We continued our day by browsing the hot market locales and walked away with some sweet deals on knock-off merchandise. In celebration of our last evening in KL, the three of us had dinner at Bollywood, a completely decked-out Indian restaurant/hotel, complete with miniature KISS shrine. We went to bed satisfied with a short, but adventure-packed visit to Malaysia’s capital city. Next stop—Singapore—to ring in the New Year.

Our First Noel in Thailand

One of the perks of working for the country’s largest Catholic School is, come Christmastime, you are blessed with a ten-day holiday. We kick-started ours with two back-to-back Christmas parties at the school. The first was planned by and for the students, and each classroom brought in a variety of food, drinks and sweets in quantities fit to feed a small nation. Before the festivities truly began, Mac’s ladyboys could be heard bickering over dish presentation and how many pictures to take before anyone could start eating. For most of the day we wandered around campus, graciously accepting plates of food (sometimes already eaten off of) in overwhelming portions. When we had run out of covert methods for refusing the heaping servings of macaroni and hotdogs or scoops of ice cream on waffles, we decided to play some basketball (uniforms and all!) The boys thought this was fantastic and cheered us on with enthusiasm, but most were too shy to join our game. The ladyboys, on the other hand, were very concerned that we would dirty our clothes and squealed whenever they were in danger of making contact with the ball. Even if we didn’t know a student from one of our classes, they knew us and were eager to ensure that the foreign teachers didn’t go hungry or miss the opportunity to pose for a candid shot with some of the boys.
Our second party was held on Christmas Eve for staff and their families. We attended evening mass at the school chapel before dinner and entertainment at the stadium. We enjoyed our dinner with Brien and Aom (the science teacher from our office and his adorable, very pregnant wife) and the German teacher/U-18 soccer coach, and his family. It was an eventful evening of lucky draws (in which Mac won a lovely set of pens), karaoke and the Christmas spirit. Once things started to wind down, we called it a night and headed back to the apartment. The next morning we would embark on our first international adventure in Southeast Asia and we wanted to be well rested… and packed.